Review of the Season

As I didn't start to save match reports until midway through the following season, so here follows a not entirely serious reminder of how 05/06 went...  

August

There was one match played at the tail end of July worth mentioning first, if only because it was a win over our old friends Lesmahagow. This match, the Clydesdale Cup semi, was as memorable, to this scribe at least, for a hot air balloon that floated over the ground and the swarms of midges with a voracious appetite for human blood than the onfield action. Lanark won the derby- again- thanks to sub Scott Mc Intyre's late goal after he pounced on the keeper's only mistake, and what a howler it was. But it was won at a cost as Craig Stark was crocked by those nasty Gow chaps and missed the first few months of the season.

A sight you never tire of seeing- the ball in Gow's net.

The month began with the Clydesdale Cup final at Moor Park, ok it was a diddy cup final but an early chance to bag silverware nonetheless. Lanark had won this competition for the previous eight seasons but alas the visitors Carluke Rovers rather unsportingly mugged us to make off with the swag. Next up was the sectional league cup group matches, and the opening game saw premier league Larkhall Thistle escape with the points in a five goal thriller. Ach well that's another diddy cup nobody really cares about...Royal Albert were next and duly dispatched in a 10 goal bonanza, before Stonehouse Violet were crushed 5-0 on their own patch in a tremendous performance. No shortage of goals in Lanark games then. All this meant that the next game, at Craighead Park, Lesmahagow, could well have been a group decider. A win for the Yowes would have meant likely qualification due to a vastly superior goal difference. But, after taking the lead through Brian Mc Cloy (pic above) and comfortably holding it until 15 left on the clock there was a problem as United keeper Al Smith had a rush of blood and got himself sent off. The Gow netted the spot kick and stole a point that they hadn't looked like getting until then and won their last game to top the group. Sadly they lost in the next round. That meant we could concentrate on the league, the opening match of which was at home to Cumbernauld, it ended in a 2-2 draw. Keegs and Huggy turning a deficit into a lead which was held until three minutes from time. The last match in August was a loss at Clydebank by the only goal. Overall, a disappointing month that promised much but yielded little success. A bit like the season as a whole really. Ah well there's always..

September

This month began with Yowes at home to Vale of Leven, a side who couldn't buy an away win the previous season but guess what, yep they left with the points! It all started well enough after grabbing an early lead but sloppy play allowed the visitors to hit three. A visit to Greenock followed, and again the Yowes shot themselves in the foot when, after grabbing a very late equaliser, they contrived to concede an even later goal to gift the home side a win. Better news wasn't far away however, in the shape of a West of Scotland cup game at home to- even at that early stage of the season-  runaway Ayrshire league leaders Irvine Meadow. In a poor game of few chances the Yowes equalised twice, the second in the last minute of the game to take it to penalties (ex-Medda man Brian Johnston netted a brace). Al Smith took the plaudits here with two shoot-out saves to put the team into round two (pic below). That was it for the month as far as competitive games went, as the holiday weekend saw most junior sides idle. A midweek friendly at Benburb was arranged to keep things ticking over and was won 3-1. This match was notable as the debut of a big gangly lad name of Cuthill.

October

October saw the team go through the month unbeaten. First up were east superleague strugglers Dundee North End for a Scottish cup first round game. The Yowes strolled into a three goal lead before allowing the visitors to peg two back. Then came the third derby of the season at home to the Gow, who took the lead in first half injury time with their only shot on target, indeed in probably their only attack all day. Lanark camped in their opponents' half for the whole second half but despite putting them under the cosh could manage only a solitary Dougie Imrie goal to show for it and the visitors stole a point. And no they didn't even have the decency to wear masks. Next up was a West Cup game at neutral Holm Park against homeless Clydebank. Maybe they could sell the Big Issue outside Glenhead to help raise funds? Only joking chaps! Lanark took a two goal lead before Bankies pulled one back. Then at last a league win, at home to St Anthony's. A Brian Johnston brace had United on easy street but a quickfire late double looked to have grabbed an unlikely point for the visitors, before big Starky popped up to head in a very late winner to get us off the hook. This was followed up seven days later with a 4-2 win at Thorniewood, a result that lifted the team off the foot of the table to complete a satisfactory month's work.

November

November also began on the winning trail with a Scottish cup match against another east superleague side, Arniston Rangers. On Guy Fawkes day all the fireworks took place in the first half as Lanark rocketed into a three goal lead by half time and the visitors' challenge had fizzled out like a damp squib. A week later came a trip to Shettleston where we made to toil before grabbing two late goals to take the points. Winter hit early and the next match at home to Glencairn was off, then the following Saturday on Yoker's paddy field of a pitch a month that had started well petered out with a miserable 1-3 defeat.

December

Only three matches played in December as the festive period proved to be far from merry for the Yowes. This month also began with a Scottish cup tie, again at home to yet another east superleague outfit, this time giants Lochee United. This match saw our cup involvement ended as, although the better side on the day, we lost. The following week saw a very unusual match at home to Glencairn. The Glens had taken an early lead which Mc Grotty equalised with a great strike. Then the ref seemed to want to take centre stage as he first (rightly) sent off a Glens man before preceeding to give Lanark just about every decision, throw yellow cards around at Glens players before dismissing another with just five minutes left. This was the break United needed as they'd struggled to penetrate their stuffy opponents, and from the umpteenth free kick Middy's bullet header won the game. There was even time to grab a third in stoppage time. The next match due against EK Thistle was postponed before a Christmas Eve game at Lesmahagow. What happened? Erm, my mind's gone blank...

January

For the first match of 2006 Lanark first- footed Vale of Leven, a ground on which they'd lost eight times in their previous 11 games and this one was to be no different. Still suffering from a festive hangover, a lacklustre display allowed the points to stay at home. At this stage, half way through the season, things were not looking too good. We'd lost the last three away games for the loss of nine goals, sat just above the drop zone and were wondering where the next win was coming from. The very next game as it turned out...

For some time speculation that Dougie Imrie (pic below) was poised for a move upstairs into senior league football loomed over the club, perhaps reflected in his and the team's last few displays, which were poor to say the least. However the visit of EK Thistle was to bring some cheer to Yowes fans at last, but not before a late scare as the visitors snatched a lead with under 10 minutes left. Kev Carson- a centre half signed during the transfer window along with left back Paul Burns- drilled home a last minute equaliser before Imrie cracked in a stoppage time winner. This was the infamous "handbags at dawn" match, a reference to an alleged post- match rammy between some players as they made for the dressing rooms. The following midweek a friendly against a Dumbarton X1 was arranged to allow their manager to see Imrie in action, and Yowes won 3-0 to further boost flagging confidence. Then on the Saturday came a trip to Cumbernauld, a side many people had been impressed with on the opening day; they had come out the traps quickly and had built up a handsome points lead at the top of the table. Although still top, they had begun to see that lead whittled down and Lanark ran riot in a 5-0 win that could have been more. Bottom dogs Shettleston were next for shaving and United routed them 7-0 in Imrie's swansong before leaving, not for Dumbarton as expected, but for Clyde, to end the month on a high note.

February

A match at St Anthony's kicked off this month and Lanark took a point from a six goal thriller in which they trailed three times. Then a home game against a Thorniewood outfit who were in disarray after their management team were sacked, plus several players had walked out in support of them. United rattled in six more without reply to move into second spot in the table, thus attaining their highest placing of the season. The Clydebank game was off so next up it was Maryhill away as the West Cup resumed after several months in cold storage. Although beaten, Lanark acquitted themselves well against a side only beaten in the final on penalties, spurning several good chances before succumbing to a debatable spot kick award and a late second goal.

March

This wasn't a good month for the team. First the EK game was postponed, then there was no game scheduled for the following week so a friendly was arranged at Tam's old stomping ground against Auchinleck, and in a bruising encounter we lost. But again the team gave a good account of itself against a side that went on to take the league and cup double. The first proper game was at Kilsyth in a central league cup match. Lanark gave little away at the back (not something you read too often!) and snatched a second half winner through Mc Grotty who, once again, failed to see out the 90 mins. Finally, a re- arranged home game against Clydebank that had to be won if we were to harbour any hopes of promotion. But in stark contrast to the previous week, a defensive horror show allowed the visitors to win 3-2 and effectively condemn us to another season in the district leagues.

April

On April fools day Lanark were at EK Thistle, themselves no mugs who also needed the points for their own promotion hopes. In a game of the proverbial two halves Yowes dominated the first period and led at the break, but Jags grabbed a late goal for a draw that helped neither side much. Then the season's only goalless draw- at home to Greenock- followed, which all but killed off any lingering hopes we may have had of taking the step up, whilst also confirming the visitors' relegation. Seven days later we were at Glencairn, another side with realistic promotion hopes, but our 1-0 win all but ended theirs (pic below- the match winner). The final Saturday of the month and indeed of the league season was at home to Yoker. Lanark totally dominated a first half yet went in at 1-1 after conceding a bizarre own goal just before the interval. The match ended 2-2 and that was that. Some fans reckoned that our poor start of just two points from five games killed us and you could also point to the loss of Imrie at a time when things were improving as something that didn't help the cause, but we were far too inconsistent in dropping points all over the place. But at least we had the consolation of being the league's top scorers with 51 (netting over 100 goals in all matches) and watching Lanark wasn't the drag it could be with some clubs. Ironically, those last two away results greatly helped our Lesmahagow friends' promotion efforts. We should've known they couldn't manage it all on their own and would need some help from their Clydesdale neighbours (despite dark mutterings on the Gow forum that Lanark would "lie down" to EK and Glens). Pleased to have been of assistance chaps!

Tam aids the Gow's promotion push

May

Just two games left to complete the season, both away in the central league cup. First, a third round 6-0 thrashing of Cumbernauld at Guys Meadow, in a clash that saw Brian Johnston grabbing his first hat trick and three homesters were harshly sent off. The "reward" for that was a quarter final at Saracen Park against Petershill, where the Yowes were well beaten to end the season on a low note. Never mind, the aim of league consolidation had been achieved and we look forward to a promotion push next season...